Lori's Old School Mix - Seite 2 
THE BUCK STOPS HERE!
Not long ago, I shared the following on Facebook . . .Rutting Season? (Is that sorta like Cuffing Season?) How many of you know anything about “rutting season”? I’d never heard the term until last Friday when my morning walk was interrupted by the appearance of a buck. Yeah, you know, a male deer (aka those jokers with those horns on their heads). Given that it was barely 7:30 in the morning, and kind of overcast, I blinked a couple of times to make sure my eyes weren’t deceiving me. Yeah, it was a buck all right. And not only was he standing in the middle of the street in front of my house, he was staring straight at me and looking right perturbed. Now, had it been a doe, I might have kept right on walking towards my house. But I’m not taking any chances with a creature that has horns growing out of its head, be it a deer, moose, elk, devil or what have you. I’m saying, I’ve already fallen once this year and dislocated a shoulder. The last thing I need is to be out in the middle of the doggone street trying to throw hands with a buck, if not run from one at 7:30 in the morning. Can’t you hear that call to 911? “Um, yeah one of my neighbors--a tall, middle-aged Black woman, who looks like she could stand to lose a few pounds-- is rolling around in the street with what appears to be a deer. Yes, and you’d better hurry. Looks like the deer has her in a headlock.”So, after hurriedly backtracking to the corner, I call the hubby and say, “There’s a buck standing out in front of our house.” Instead of saying, “Hold on honey, I’m coming to get you” this man heads for the front door and starts asking a bunch of questions. And even has the nerve to tell me he doesn’t see any dang buck and yada, yada, yada.” I was like, “Man, if you don’t stop yacking and come and get my behind off this corner . . .”After arriving safely back home is when I discovered that Mr. Buck was now hanging out in our backyard and trying to woo a shy Miss Doe, who he’d obviously pursued there. On sharing the story with my son, he was like, “Oh, so what you’re saying Ma, is that our backyard was the hook-up spot!” Ah, yeah, whatever. I’m not trying to have a bunch of amorous deer all up in the bushes in my backyard. Take that mess on somewhere else. Anyway, since then, I’ve learned that it’s rutting season--the time of year in these parts that deer commonly mate. So, guess who won’t be going out on her morning walk for a while? In the meantime, I’ve added a walking stick, a can of mace and a whistle to my Christmas list. The screen and the blinds on the window kept me from getting a clear picture. And you’d best believe dude (aka Mr. Buck) was straight up mean-mugging me the whole time I was trying to snap this shot.
No, I wasn't in a movie. And while I'd love to announce that something I've written has been optioned for a film, that's not the case either. 😊But not long ago, Arkana Journal invited me to participate in their “Contributor Spotlight.” They asked me a few questions about my essay “The Trees Of Mississippi: A Strange and Bitter Crop” (featured in issue #8 of Arkana) and one about my writing influences. See the following for specifics.--How did composing this piece leave you feeling once it was finished?--Legacy appears as an important theme in this work. What legacy do you wish to leave the reader with this piece?--Which authors influence your writing the most and why?If you're interested or even mildly curious about my responses, you can visit the Contributor Spotlight Lori D. Johnson link HERE.
ANOTHER NICE SURPRISE . . . PUBLICATION WISE
My essay, "The Trees of Mississippi: A Strange and Bitter Crop" appears in the latest issue of Arkana: A literary journal of mysteries and marginalized voices (Issue #8 / April 28, 2020). If that alone wasn't cause for celebration, the essay was also selected as the winner of the Arkana Editor's Choice Award in Creative Nonfiction. Talk about a nice surprise! In addition to reading the essay, you have have the option of listening to me read it. Reading my nonfiction isn't my strong suit, but I think I deserve a few points for effort. Besides, how will I ever get better if I'm not willing to take the risk of putting myself out there and being, well, less than great? LOL 😄 The pics feature here are of some of the trees I saw on my last visit to Water Valley, Mississippi. All, but one of the photos, captures trees I spotted on land owned by my family--The Hawkins.
The Second Time Around . . . For "A Lesson In Failure"
Yes, it's true. My essay "A Lesson In Failure" was selected for another book in the CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE SOUL series. Look for copies of THE MAGIC OF MOMS at your local Target, Wal-mart, Barnes & Noble, Books-a-Million--basically, most places where books are still being sold (also check online). Add Chicken Soup For The Soul's THE MAGIC OF MOMS to your Mother's Day shopping list. A portion of the royalties will be donated to charity. **Previously, "A Lesson In Failure" appeared in Chicken Soup's BEST ADVICE I EVER HEARD.**
And The Third Place Award Goes To . . .
Yes, my essay "Loss Of Contact" won 3rd Place in the CWC Nonfiction Contest for 2020! (CWC = Charlotte Writers' Club) The contest judge, Charles Israel, Jr. (a writing instructor at Queens University of Charlotte) said the following about Loss of Contact: "This writer captures our loss of friends in an intriguing and novel way--through the symbol of address books. How do we deal with the passing of time, as friends--and ourselves--move away and indeed, move on? This essay gives us a subtle, witty, and poignant answer. And this writer knows how to take care of her reader: she will pause to address us directly, as our friends do in real life."--Charles Israel, Jr.--
FOR THE LOVE OF LISTS AND LAUGHS
A few followers of my blog might remember how much I enjoyed coming up with lists for the now defunct Thursday Thirteen meme. Whenever I could, I tried to inject a bit of humor into my lists. I miss those days. But not long ago, I found a spot that welcomes my OCD driven brand of humor and list fixation. If you’re at all interested in checking out my odd and (hopefully) amusing lists, I encourage you to look me up on the Humoroutcasts website. My latest post covers the 8 Reasons I May Stop Going To The Movie Theater. Let me know what, if anything, has altered your movie-going experience. My first post on the Humoroutcasts website covered the 9 Wrestling Smack-downs I'd love to see. The matches included Mitch McConnell vs. The Notorious RBG and Lindsey Graham vs. The Squad. Checkout the full post on the website if you'd like to see some of the other matches on my list.
FIGHTING BATTLES
Recently, I shared the following on my Facebook Page Okay, so I have a problem I’d like to share in hopes that some kind soul can offer a solution. For the past several days, I’ve been struggling to win a fight--a contest of wills, if you will, and with a most formidable opponent. At the moment, all in my world is calm to the point of being downright peaceful. I’d like to believe that I may have unwittingly gained the upper hand. But in the past my opponent has proved both clever and agile, so I’m not totally convinced the battle is over or even close to being won. And just who might my evil nemesis be? A chipmunk. Yeah, you heard right, I’ve been doing battle with this dang devil of a chipmunk who won’t stop digging holes in the pot of zinnias I recently planted. So, the pot--full of potting soil-- sat undisturbed on my front porch for about a week until I finally decided to go ahead and plant my zinnia seeds. I can’t remember if I planted the seeds before my recent trip to ATL or shortly thereafter, but I do know this past weekend is when the showdown began. My gardening skills are limited. So having spotted a number of little green shoots jutting up through the soil, I was feeling pretty good about myself. But on a casual stroll past the windows adjoining the front door, I noticed all of this dirt scattered about on the porch. A quick peek thru the window blinds confirmed my fears--something had been messing around in my flower pot. The hubby suggested a bird might be the culprit. A cat or possibly a snake were my first thoughts. Whatever it was, maybe it will go elsewhere is what I told myself as I refilled the hole the little varmint had created in the potting soil. Ha! The very next morning, what--or make that who do I see on the porch snuggled up next to the pot when I peeked through the blinds--yep, ole guilty himself--Mr. Chipmunk. “Don’t you dare!” I shouted as I snatched opened the door and watched him make a run for it. Knowing it was only a matter of time before he made a return visit, I did a Google search for how to chase away chipmunks and found a “cayenne pepper” solution. Mix cayenne in some water and spray around the area. Not only did I spray the area down with cayenne water, I sprinkled a healthy dose of red pepper flakes around the pot too. You think it worked? Ha! I’m pretty sure Mr. Chipmunk said, “Well, would you look at this. Ole Girl was nice enough to leave out some seasoning for the zinnia seeds.” Yeah, that little joker came back and dug yet another hole, leaving dirt and little green leaves scattered everywhere. I was standing at the door, scratching my head, cursing beneath my breath, and trying to figure out what to do next when the folks from Best Buy pulled up with the washing machine I’d recently purchased. In hauling out the old washer and carting in the new, the Best Buy guys adjusted front door so it would remain in the open position while they work. Not a problem--except if Mr. Chipmunk shows up again and on spying the open door decides to slip inside and pay me a surprise visit. In anticipation of such an occurrence, I called my son downstairs to watch and stand guard. ‘Cause y’all know, if Mr. Chipmunk gets inside of my house, it’s all over with right? Yeah, I don’t have any problems going toe-to-toe with the little varmint outdoors, on my front porch, and even in the front yard. But once he’s inside of my house all bets are off. Really, he can have it, I’m saying, the house as well as any and everything of value inside, ‘cause you best believe, I will be exiting the premises with the quickness and calling for backup in the form of the nearest pest control agency. Fortunately, it didn’t come to that. After the Best Buy guys left, I had my son move the flower pot to the backyard and place it on a patio table. A temporary solution that might buy me some time until I could think of what to do next. Another Google search turned up a suggestion for tea tree oil. Okay, so the next morning before I head off to the drugstore to purchase the oil, I peek out the window off the patio and guess who I see? Yep, Mr. Chipmunk. I kid you not, he was hanging out near the table containing the pot of the remaining zinnias, just as big and bad as you please, as if to say, “It’s going to take a whole lot more than that to get rid of me, girlfriend!” Lil dude was straight up selling wolf tickets, but all it took was a quick jiggle of the door to send his little butt running again. As it stands now, I guess we are at a stalemate of sorts. On purchasing the tea tree oil, I gave the pot of zinnias a real good greasing. I’m not sure if the scent alone is supposed to keep the chipmunk away or if the slipperiness of the now greased up pot will keep him from climbing inside the container again and break-dancing around in my potting soil. Even though it’s been a while since I’ve seen Mr. Chipmunk or any evidence of his presence, I wouldn’t put it past him to show up again. The hubby jokingly said when he does come back, he’ll probably be accompanied by a few of his little chipmunk friends. All I know is that Alvin and ‘nem better keep their little furry paws off my zinnias! But if my tea tree oil doesn’t work y’all, I’m open to suggestions--especially from those of you with green thumbs and who have successfully chased pests from your garden (s) before. Seriously. Thanks in advance.
A LITTLE LIGHT (1 of 3 Winners in a "First Chapter" Contest)
I'M A WINNER (1 of 3 actually) For those who enjoy my fiction, I’m proud to announce that the first chapter of my unpublished novel --A LITTLE LIGHT--was selected as one of the winners in the Meet Me @ 19th Street “First Chapter Contest.” Meet Me @ 19th Street is an online literary journal published by Arch Street Press. If interested, you can read the first chapter of A LITTLE LIGHT on Arch Street Press’s website. The chapter ends in a way that I hope will make you want to read more. Should you happen to like what you read, please share the link on FB and Twitter or pass it along to a friend. Also, feel free to share your comments here. Thanks!
MORE NEW WORK / "A Lesson In Failure" by Lori D. Johnson / Chicken Soup For The Soul: Best Advice I Ever Heard
Any fans and/or readers of CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE SOUL out there? If so, I invite you to check out my essay “A Lesson In Failure” in their newly released Chicken Soup For The Soul: The Best Advice I Ever Heard. ⇩⇩⇩ Includes “A Lesson In Failure” by Lori D. Johnson (Available online & via your Local Bookstore) ❤❤❤ What's it about? Mainly, a learning experience I shared with this young man. ⇩⇩⇩ (my son Aaron) Pick up a copy of the book Chicken Soup For The Soul: Best Advice I Ever Heard and read my essay "A Lesson in Failure" if you want to know more. 😇😇😇
My MaDear's Scrapbook
In an essay that appears in Chapter 16, I wrote about the scrapbook I inherited from my grandmother. Some of her interests truly surprised me. Yes, that's the actual cover in the pic below. You can read more here: https://chapter16.org/madears-scrapbook/