THE B-MOVIE CATECHISM

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DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 20, 2019
Squirm (1976) Agitated worms make a meal out of a small southern town full of actors practicing their Dixie drawls. TIL: The worm in Hell that doesn't die mentioned in Mark 9 is often interpreted as the remorse of conscience. Still Voices - A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985) "What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you." - Ralph Waldo EmersonDad Rock Daily: Bob Dylan - Blood On The Tracks (1975) Poor ol' Bob's heart gets broken and we all reap the benefits. One of his best. Laudable Lyrics: In a little hilltop village, they gambled for my clothes. I bargained for salvation and she gave me a lethal dose.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 18, 2019
Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid (2004) Expedition in search of a flower that grants eternal youth gets gobbled up by big snakes. The monkey out-acts everyone. TIL: The Peristeria, or Holy Spirit Orchid, won't grant everlasting life, but it will remind you of who does.Still Voices - The Outing (1987) "Remember, we all stumble, every one of us. That's why it's a comfort to go hand in hand." - Emily KimbroughDad Rock Daily: Chic - C'est Chic (1978) Bernard Edwards & Nile Rodgers not only produce, they play their hearts out. Turns out not all Disco sucks. Laudable Lyrics: Take a little chance, it don't mean nothing. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 17, 2019
Day of the Animals (1977) Depleted ozone (back when that still scared people) drives beasties berserk. Leslie Nielsen wrestles a bear, so at least it's entertaining. TIL: When we fail to exercise proper stewardship of creation. we lose a sense of communion with our fellow human beings.Still Voices - Dead Of Night (1945) "Your mind is your prison when you focus on your fear." - Tim FargoDad Rock Daily: Eagles - Desperado (1973) Go ahead, claim to hate them all you want, but as soon as the title track plays you know you secretly believe they wrote it specifically about you. Laudable Lyrics: And it's a certain kind of fool who likes to hear the sound of his own name.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 14, 2019
It Conquered the World (1956) Corman classic has cucumber from Venus attempting to rid Earth of all its pesky emotions. You know you like it. TIL: Emotions are neither good nor evil. They are morally qualified only to the extent that they effectively engage reason and will.Still Voices - The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) “After a good dinner one can forgive anybody, even one's own relations.” - Oscar WildeDad Rock Daily: Praying Mantis - Time Tells No Lies (1981) Overlooked entry in the NWOBHM genre offers some strong melodic twin guitar attacks. Laudable Lyrics: Running through the wilderness, never standing still. Hell is close behind me moving in for the kill.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 13, 2019
Hour of the Wolf (1968) Horror ala Ingmar Bergman. Easy to parody, but a masterpiece of tension and dread nevertheless. TIL: Fitzgerald called the hour halfway between midnight and dawn 'the dark night of the soul,' which in spiritual terms is a crisis in one's journey toward God.Still Voices - Weird Woman (1944) "You don't have to gaze into a crystal ball when you can read an open book." - Aneurin BevanDad Rock Daily: Pat Benetar - Crimes of Passion (1980) Sophomore effort from the songbird finally brings her 4.5-octave voice to full fruition. She does a pretty wicked Kate Bush cover as well. Laudable Lyrics: Open your eyes, maybe you'll see the light.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 11, 2019
The Incredible Melting Man (1977) Space jockey with porn-stache turns into slowly dissolving cannibal. Standard B-stuff highlighted by buckets of goo courtesy of Rick Baker. TIL: Acedia, or sloth, is a sort of slow spiritual wasting away due to an indifference to holy duties.Still Voices - Funky Forest The First Contact (2005) "Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them." - P.J. O'RourkeDad Rock Daily: The Beach Boys - Sunflower (1970) Uneven, dated, easy listening music? Well, maybe, but it's still among the prettiest uneven, dated easy listening music you're likely to find. Laudable Lyrics: The Sunday morning gospel goes good with the soul.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 9, 2019
Deathgasm (2015) Garage band's lyrics unleash a demonic Armageddon in this humorous homage to early bloodsoaked Peter Jackson. TIL: It's been said that Catholicism is the most metal of religions, because who else eats the flesh and drinks the blood of their God? ;-)Still Voices - The Cyclops (1957) "Press on. Obstacles are seldom the same size tomorrow as they are today." - Robert H. SchullerDad Rock Daily: Dio - Holy Diver (1983) Proof that Dio's Rainbow and Sabbath days served him well. Bombastic solo debut sets the stage for all power metal to follow. Laudable Lyrics: You can see his stripes but you know he's clean. Oh, don't you see what I mean.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 8, 2019
Parts: The Clonus Horror (1979) Two teens discover they are clones being bred for spare parts. Big concept done fairly badly. TIL: Organ transplants conform to moral law if the physical and psychological dangers to the donor are proportionate to the good sought for the recipient.Still Voices - Better Off Dead (1985) "If you learn a recipe, you can cook the recipe. If you learn the technique, you can cook anything." - Michael SymonDad Rock Daily: Maze - Inspiration (1979) Some excellent, some standard soft soul, but so relentlessly positive you won't mind the ups and downs. Laudable Lyrics: You don't always get the things you wanted to That's alright that could be good for you.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 7, 2019
Not of This Earth (1957) To save his own world, an alien drinks human blood and wears his sunglasses at night. Ultra-cheap Corman is good Corman. TIL: Under Catholic doctrine, the direct intentional killing of innocents, even to save others, is never permissible.Still Voices - Batman Returns (1992) "Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." - Robert A. HeinleinDad Rock Daily: Lou Reed - Berlin (1973) Because there are times you're just in the mood to endure an agonizing masterpiece of despair and lessons not learned. Laudable Lyrics: Men of good fortune very often can't do a thing, while men of poor beginnings often can do anything.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 5, 2019
Better Off Dead (1985) Classic cult comedy has a sullen teen considering suicide after being dumped, but failing hysterically at each attempt. TIL: Suicide is a sin, but grave psychological disturbances that impede free will can remove responsibility and consequences for the act.Still Voices - The Dark Crystal (1982) "To see what is in front of one’s nose needs a constant struggle." - George OrwellDad Rock Daily: Bob Welch - French Kiss (1977) Starts with the ubiquitous hit ballad, but soon settles into a pleasing Steve Miller with disco strings kind of groove. Laudable lyrics: Find the darkest night that you can find and see if you can read between the lines.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 3, 2019
Mandy (2018) Nic Cage acts cuckoo, this time for good reason as a crazed religious cult has kidnapped his wife. TIL: Religion's purpose is to make us humble before God and to open us to His path of love. If yours isn't doing that for you, one of you is doing something wrong.Still Voices - Scared to Death (1947) "If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation." - Jean KerrDad Rock Daily: Nitty Gritty Dirt Band - Nitty Gritty Dirt Band (1967) The Byrds meet Rudy Vallée and they don't get along too well. Laudable Lyrics: I wrote my name upon the sands with questioningly weary hands. The tide arose and answered me and washed my name into the sea.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 2, 2019
The Mole People (1956) Memorable schlock has John Agar discovering a race of underground mutants enslaved by albino Ishtar worshipers. TIL: The endless effort to paint Catholicism as warmed over paganism claims Easter is derived from Ishtar. Two minutes on Google discredits this.Still Voices - House of Horrors (1946) "The true work of art is but a shadow of the divine perfection." - MichelangeloDad Rock Daily: The Damned - Damned Damned Damned (1977) Hey, it's punk, you don't need to play all that well. Hear my non-stop cymbals, ye mighty, and despair! Laudable Lyrics: A distant man can't sympathize, he can't uphold his distant laws.

DAILY CALL SHEET: SEPTEMBER 1, 2019
The Thing That Couldn't Die (1958) Satanist's undying severed head makes trouble at a dude ranch for a water witch and her pals. As silly as it sounds. TIL: Like everything else he offers, Satan's idea of eternal life is a twisted corruption of the true thing.Still Voices - Killer Klowns From Outer Space (1988) "Nobody likes a clown at midnight." - Stephen KingDad Rock Daily: Eric Clapton - 461 Ocean Boulevard (1974) So long glorified rock guitar god, hello to the beginning of a long slow slide into adult contemporary hell. Laudable Lyrics: Lord, I've done so much wrong, but please, give me strength to carry on.

DAILY CALL SHEET: AUGUST 31, 2019
Mr. Sardonicus (1961) Nobleman demands doctor help cure his ghastly grimace. The fun includes an on-screen punishment poll to decide if the villain lives or dies. TIL: Given today's more effective systems of detention, the Church no longer believes the death penalty is warranted.Still Voices - Mr. Sardonicus (1961) "And so let us always meet each other with a smile, for the smile is the beginning of love, and once we begin to love each other naturally we want to do something." - Mother TeresaDad Rock Daily: John Lennon - Plastic Ono Band (1970) Like eavesdropping on the therapy sessions of an embittered disillusioned atheist. Raw, powerful, and ultimately sad. Laudable Lyrics: Hold on world, world hold on. It's going to be alright. You're going to see the light.

DAILY CALL SHEET: AUGUST 28, 2019
The Touch of Satan (1971) Lost motorist takes up with a young witch only to find there's a catch, the old hag in the upstairs bedroom. Tries to be a slow burn, but never catches fire. TIL: As Pope Francis said, Satan knows how to seduce us with a package without letting us see what's inside.Still Voices - Hellraiser (1987) "In all human love it must be realized that every man promises a woman, and every woman promises a man that which only God alone can give, namely, perfect happiness." - Fulton J. SheenDad Rock Daily: Robert Wyatt - Rock Bottom (1974) Moody art-rock explorations from former Soft Machine drummer will likely be challenging for the melodically inclined. Laudable Lyrics: In the morning when it's time to play at being human for a while, please smile.


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